Rudolph the Red Nosed Racist, a christmas carol

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Rudolph the red nosed racist
told a bright and shining lie (about NYPD Police Brutality),
and if you ever heard it,
you would even say it glowed (like a lightbulb).

All of the other right-wingers,
used to laugh and call him names (like liberal).
They never let poor Rudolph,
join in any right-wing games.

Then one sunny September Day,
Dubya came to say:
“Rudolph with your self-serving lies so bright,
won’t you help me scare America and scapegoat Muslims tonight?

Then all the right-wingers loved him,
as they shouted out with glee:
“Rudoph the Red Nosed Racist,
you’ll be the next President in history!”

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Mama got runover by Barack Obama, a christmas carol

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 Hillary Rodham Clinton

Mama got runover by Barack Obama, a christmas carol

Sung to the tune of Grandma got runover by a reindeer

Mama done got run’d over by Barack Obama. On the road to the White House Christmas Eve.  You can say there’s no such thing as Santa, but as for me and Bubba we believe.  She’d been drinking Rummy’s Kool-Aid and voted for the War, as we begged her to do no more. But she forgot her triangulation, and she staggered out the door. When we found her Christmas morning, at the scene of the attack, she had book-prints on her forehead, and an incriminating book, the Audacity of Hope on her back.

Now we’re all so proud of Bubba,  He’s been taking this all so well. See him in there carousing the females, drinking root beer and playing cards with James Carville. It’s not Christmas without Mama, and Chelsea’s dressed in black and we just can’t help but wonder: Should we open up her gifts, or send them back? Send them back!!

Now the Ham is on the table and so is the sweet potato pie and the gold and platinum candles that would just have matched the Miss Clairol in Mama’s head. I’ve warned all my friends and neighbors better watch out for yourselves, they should never vote for a man who cavorts with neo-cons like Condi and endorses devilish elves (like Joe Lieberman).

I saw Mark Foley kissing Santa Claus, a christmas carol

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I saw Mark Foley kissing Santa Claus under the mistletoe last night. He didn’t see me creep down the stairs to have a peep; He thought that I was tucked away in the congressional page dormitory fast asleep. Then I saw Mark tongue Santa Claus real deep. What a laugh it would have been if Speaker Denny had only seen Mark Foley kissing Santa Claus last night

O Come All Ye Clintonista Faithful: a christmas carol

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Hillary Clinton campaign logo

O Come All Ye Clintonista Faithful

O Come All Ye Clintonista Faithful
Joyful Triangulating DLC Centrists,
O come ye, O come ye to the
Washington, DC Beltway.
Come and behold Her,
Born the bane of the vast right wing conspiracy;
O come, let us adore Her,
O come, let us adore Her,
O come, let us adore Her,
the First Woman President.

O Sing, choirs of establishment pundits,
Sing in exultation,
Sing all that hear in heaven Hill’s holy word.
Repair Bill’s marriage and give Hill Power in the Highest;
O come, let us adore Her,
O come, let us adore Her,
O come, let us adore Her,
The First Woman President.

All Hail! Hill, we greet Thee,
Your Prez Campaign Born the happy morning of John Kerry’s Defeat,
O Hillary Rodham Clinton for evermore be Thy name adored.
Word of the Pollsters, now in flesh appearing;
O come, let us adore Her,
O come, let us adore Her,
O come, let us adore Her,
The First Woman President.