Olbermann slaps down Dubya’s troop surge

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“Only this president, only in this time, only with this dangerous, even messianic, certitude, could answer a country demanding an exit strategy from Iraq by offering instead an entrance strategy for Iran.  Only this president could look out over a vista of 3,008 dead and 22,834 wounded in Iraq, and finally say, where mistakes have been made, the responsibility rests with me, only to follow that by proposing to repeat the identical mistake in Iran.” 

“Only this president could extol the thoughtful recommendations of the Iraq Study Group and then take it‘s most far sighted recommendation, engage Syria and Iran, and transform it into threaten Syria and Iran, when al Qaeda would like nothing better than for us to threaten to Syria, and when President Ahmadinejad would like nothing better than to be threatened by us.” 

“This is diplomacy by skimming.  It is internationalism by drawing pictures of superman in the margins of the textbooks.  It is a presidency of Cliff Notes.  And to Iran and Syria, and yes, also to the insurgents in the Iraq, we must look like a country run by the equivalent of the drunken pest, who gets battered to the floor of the saloon by one punch, then staggers to his feet and shouts at the other guy‘s friends, OK, which one of you is next?” 

“Mr. Bush, the question is no longer what are you thinking, but rather, are you thinking at all?  …You, sir, have become the president that cried wolf.  All that you say about Iraq now could be gospel.  All that you say about Iran and Syria now could be prescient and essential.  We no longer have a clue, sir.  We heard too many stories.  Many of us are as inclined to believe you just shuffled the director of national intelligence over to the State Department because he thought you were wrong about Iran.  Many of us are as inclined to believe you just put a pilot in charge of the grounds wars in Iraq and Afghanistan because he would be truly useful in an air war next door in Iran.” 

“Your assurances, sir, and your demands that we trust you, have lost all shape and texture.  They are now merely fertilizer for conspiracy theories.  They are now fertilizer indeed.  The pile has been built slowly and with seeming care.  I read this list last night before the president‘s speech, and it bears repetition, because its shape and texture are perceptible only in such a context.” 

“Before Mr. Bush was elected, he said nation building was wrong for America.  Now he says it is vital.  He said he would never put U.S. troops under foreign control.  Last night he promised to embed them in Iraqi units.  He told us about WMD, mobile labs, secret sources, aluminum tubes, yellow cake.  He has told us the war in necessary because Saddam was a material threat, because of 9/11, because of Osama bin Laden, al Qaeda, terrorism in general, to liberate Iraq, to spread freedom, to spread democracy, to prevent terrorism by gas price increases, because this was a guy who tried to kill his dad, because 439 words into that speech last night he trotted out 9/11 again.”

Damn, Keith, I almost feel like I need to help Dubya find the shattered pieces of his face you sent crashing to the floor.  Another example of why Keith Olbermann is the real “King of All Media.”