RNC Opens: Cindy McCain and Laura Bush’s (humorous) appeal


The miscreants behind this year’s Republican National Convention belatedly recognized that celebrating the ruling classes triumph over fair taxation and the destruction of the social safety net would look questionable juxtaposed with the disastrous flooding and carnage on the Gulf Coast.  Seeking to soften their perceived image as greedy capitalists with the American public, they trotted out Cindy McCain and Laura Bush to make a brief and seemingly heartfelt appeal:


Mrs. McCain: Thank You.  I am so honored and so proud to be standing next to Mrs. Bush.  As we  work together to extend our support to relief efforts in the gulf, as each of the gulf coast governors just expressed to us, their challenges will continue in the days ahead, but everything will be fine as long as our disaster capitalist cronies continue receiving no-bid contracts and reap record profits from doing a half-assed job undoing the damage of Hurricanes that God fortuitously sends their way.


I am sure that you’ve heard of another disaster hitting America today—Hurricane Palin and her daughter’s tacky, trailer park pregnancy.  17-year-old Bristol Palin deserves our pity and support in this trying time.  As John has been saying for the last several days, its time to take off our Republicans hats and get Bristol’s boyfriend a jimmy hat.  Together, we can prevent this girl from getting knocked up again.


In that spirit, we’d like to ask that you go to a website—it’s called birth control, fool.com and give the largest contribution that you can give.


Mrs. Bush:  I thank the heavenly father for the morning after pill. As the First Lady, I took the opportunity to smuggle some into the country from overseas before George legalized it in the U.S. God only knows how many babies Jenna and Barbara would have had after all their drunken carousing without it. 

Privilege by rstrawser.



Mrs. McCain: Speaking of the morning after pill, I told my girls that I woulda disinherited their spoiled little assess, like I did my sisters, if they pulled a stunt like this.


Mrs. Bush: Anyway, y’all, we Americans are known for coming to the aid of their fellow citizens when crises such as these arise.  Today, and in the coming days, let’s work together to provide those affected with the means to save face and continue their deceptive, racist, and demagogic campaign for continued Republican control of the White House.


Thank You and God Bless You



60 thoughts on “RNC Opens: Cindy McCain and Laura Bush’s (humorous) appeal

  1. Mstate

    I really had trouble watching the 15 minute video. I kept moving it ahead when I started to gag. The RNC is doing a fund raiser to an organization called Cause Greater, which apparently was created just for this hurricaine in FL, AL, MI, LA, and TX. It’s so new that when I checked it out on Charity Navigator and 2 other sites that rate charities, there’s no mention of it.
    However, if you go to Obama’s site there is a direct link to the American Red Cross if a person wishes to make a donation. ARC kind of screwed up after 9/11 and Katrina but now is back on track as it got a 4 star rating from Charity Navigator, which is their highest.

    As far as Ms. Palin goes, I guess “total abstinence” was not one of those family values she taught her kids.

  2. Thanks for the report SB. I don’t have a cast-iron stomach either, so I can’t watch any of it.

    So FreakShow 2008 starts off with an appeal to help those poor people that have 8 less houses than the average Republican in attendance. How charitable, and macabre at the same time. Well praise Jesus that someone at least had the good sense to tell Cheney to GTFO of the country all this week.

  3. “The RNC is doing a fund raiser to an organization called Cause Greater”

    This is probably one of Dobson’s creations, which he’ll skim off the top to fund Quaylin’s newly hired legal team.

  4. akech

    This could be a winning ticket for McCain if and only if the neocons ideologues are not hoping to use McCain’s volitile temper and his VP lack of experience to go on the world domination rampage by invading one country after another. Otherwise, we may see the invasion of Iran using American forces and the escalation of cold war with Russia .
    The neocons agenda of using US forces to dominate the rest of world and ruin other people’s cultures and families in a manner similar to what has happened to Iraqi families and their civilization is scary. The dictator, Saddam Hussein, could have been isolated and neutralized without distabilizing Iraq , its culture and families rotting in camps in neighboring countries.

  5. akech

    Juggling motherwhood and family has not worked well for Governor Sara Palin.

    A Well rounded girl from a responsible family should be heading to college at the age of 17 instead of becoming a mother.

    Reports suggests that Gov. Palin went back to work one month after having her current 5-months old baby! This may be admirable to some, but very crazy others.

    I do hope those who are applauding fortitude are not suggesting that a woman has to be a workhorse juggling the raising a family and holding a full time job because raising five children and holding a full time job is like holding three fulltime jobs!! It could be that she was not there for her 17-year old daughter who obviously was getting attention somewhere else!!

  6. Bob H

    Hoping here that Palin’s speech is as combative & ideologically rigid as was Buchanan’s at the ’92 GOPcon, & has the same unhelpful effect. Won’t be watching, though. Life’s too short to sit through these entitled idiots trying to read their Teleprompters, unless I were being paid (well).

    Looks like BO & JB & Co are playing this in (IMO) the right, and smart, way: say nothing, let the Rethugs froth & snap at the air as one unflattering fact after another surfaces about SP (and thus reminds us all of JM & his rather “mavericky” vetting process).

  7. zeitgeist9000

    This election cycle has been a most-riveting opera!

    No soap, just opera!

    I can’t wait for what happens next.

    In sum:

    1. An angry white woman.
    2. A promising young black man.
    3. A former POW.
    4. An Alaskan.
    5. A unwed teenage mother and a baby-daddy.

    I wonder if “Regular Joe” Biden will actually make the difference in this election.

  8. sam

    The most interesting thing about the “dual” divas was the body language. Cindy shrugged off any sort of touchy-feely w/Laura… the cool distance was pitiful. By the way, I guess there really is a difference between a Republican(hat) and an American(hat). Obama/Biden ’08!!!

  9. The big story with the baby momma drama is that Quaylin was chosen for Veep by Dobson and gang, and was definitely not vetted. They got real jumpy after Obama’s speech and didn’t look before they leaped. Now McInsane has an Alaskan albatross around his neck.

    Very weird how the 5-month pregnancy is suddenly announced after the blogs started researching the story of the last baby. Something just doesn’t smell right with this fish. Stay tuned for further updates…I have a feeling there’s a few more twists and turns about to unfold.

  10. It’s clear to many people that Sarah Palin is not qualified to be the Vice President of the United States. But that does not mean that she will drag down the GOP ticket. This is the country, after all, that re-elected George W. Bush (thanks Ohio) and voted for a ticket that included a man who lost a spelling bee to a second grader (remember Dan Quayle?).

    Sara Palin is the personification of the right-wing All-American girl. She is pretty, she has five kids (the oldest about to be deployed to Iraq, the youngest one with Down Syndrome) she hunts and skins moose, she speaks well, she is a religious fanatic….She is the right wing ideal of womanhood. DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE HER!!!!!!

    Also, it is really, really bad form to pick on her 17 year old pregnant daughter, and to pull her disabled infant into this race. Not only is it plain and simply immoral to pick on kids and babies, the right wing will twist these insults into their narrative of aggrieved, hard working AMericans, under assault from minorities and effete elitists. This is the bait many of us seem ready to take. I say resist.

  11. zeitgeist9000

    Trip, you’re right–that’s why Obama quickly put down these kinds of attacks.

    I just needed to comment on it directly because five days ago, no one knew this family. Now their drama is thrust upon us, and it’s as if the McCain campaign didn’t vet her (I agree with you Ernesto). This has all the signs of a “panicked pick.” What pressure for a young woman to think that her actions may have a bearing on her mother’s career. And for Sarah Palin I only say good luck because sistah girl you are brand new to the game!

    Hillary, McCain, Barack, Joe–they’ve essentially been campaigning for well over twenty years put together.

    I don’t see how Palin can even compete. She was definitely setup to succeed or fail based on circumstances beyond her control. God bless her because when this is all over I hope she doesn’t blame herself for McCain’s loss and that she goes on to have a successful political career in her own right.

  12. Trip,

    You’re so kind.

    And, you’d have a point, but for this fact…


    She ‘s a more moral human being because SHE CHOSE to carry to term a Down’s Syndrome baby.

    When you make that as one of her selling points – anything is fair game.

  13. Rikyrah,

    I totally agree with your point. The GOP is exploiting Palin’s children. But you remember the old saying: two wrongs do not make a right. Just put yourself in her 17 year old daughter’s shoes. It’s bad enough that the GOP is selling her at the prodigal daughter. If the Democrats make her the poster child for right wing hypocrisy they will be just as guilty of indecency and the Republicans. Also–and importantly—it will feed into the Republican strategy to paint this very average American family as victims of an elitist liberal cabal.

  14. sam

    Doing something I never (or at least) rarely, do, I got onto the Baby Daddy’s(Levi) web blog… sounds as if he did not want to( doesn”t) but will be a daddy….I am a Womens’Studies/Poli-Sci Graduate, feminist, mother of two, grandmother of 5, young widow, who still believes in a woman’s right to choose, social conscience, and being a compassionate, liberaal Democrat. BTW, for whomever keeps tabs, I am white, a former Hillary fanatic who wholeheartedly supports Barak Obama. Birthing babies is not a criteria for US Pres.

  15. This is hilarous only because Dobson is heartbroken and flabbergasted. He stepped in shyte and he knows McClone is pissed at him for the impulse buy that blew up in his face like a gag cigar.

    What’s not so funny: Lost in the baby momma drama is the fact that Palin is a sleaze bag for firing some poor schmuck that had nothing to do with her perpetual trailer park family drama. This dude’s only grounds for termination was not firing the governor’s brother-in-law. Personally, I don’t care what kind of fucked up parenting mess she runs at home. You do not bring this mess into your job as head of state government.

  16. Rick

    sorry ya’ll, i’m actually trying to watch some of this Republican Convention and, it’s just dawg gone awful…

  17. Angie

    “Also, it is really, really bad form to pick on her 17 year old pregnant daughter, and to pull her disabled infant into this race.”

    Trip: I don’t really think anyone is picking on her 17-year-old daughter or the disabled child. What people are simply doing is pointing out how this woman, this mother of supposedly five children, most likely four children, needs to reassess her priorities.

    Here are the facts… And this is coming from a woman who has a significant disability. I have been disabled since my preteen years; and I’ve lived with this disability and the impact of the disability for 20 years. I have also worked in the disability field for the last ten years. So, I think I can speak on this with a greater understanding than most.

    Sarah Palin, no matter what a maverick she is, needs to be in a position that she can provide comprehensive care and support to her disabled child. This child needs his mother, not a damn nanny to assure him, to cradle him, and to nurture him. This child needs an advocate, someone that will make sure that medical professionals, school officials, and even other family members are doing what is right for the child. This child needs someone that will challenge stereotypes and limitations placed on him by doctors and educational diagnosticians, so that he can maximize his abilities and fully develop his innate strengths.

    Therefore, in order for Sarah Palin to do that, to do those things, this woman does not need to be on the campaign trail, spending months away from her special needs infant. Being a good mother is not just carrying the baby to term and delivering it. Being a good mother extends far after the birthing process. And I challenge anyone that says that this woman can be a good mother to a special needs infant while she is gallivanting all over the country for a losing race, while she is working as the vice president.

    Can mothers of disabled children work? Of course… That’s not what I am saying. But I think that everyone knows that the duties and responsibilities of someone that is on the campaign trail, and the duties of someone that is working as a vice president is much greater than the average working mother.

    Now as for Pistol Bristol… I would think if my 11th grade daughter got pregnant, I would need to spending time with my family, rather than spending time away from them. Especially if my daughter was pregnant by a fool that declares himself “a self proclaimed f__king redneck”… I would be making sure I had the time to provide my daughter with as much wisdom and guidance on how to be a good mother a good wife. (Since they are forcing her into both.) But Sarah can’t do neither of those things if she is spending the next few months, trying to trick the American public into thinking that she is qualified to be the vice president.

    And the above is only my opinion on this woman’s questionable commitment to parenting her oldest child and her youngest child. And while I think that this woman’s parenting choices speaks volumes about her character and her ability to prioritize, this is only the chip off the iceberg regarding what I really think about her. I‘ll just say for now that I think that JM’s decision to select this woman is further proof that the man is suffering from senility.

  18. Angie,

    I think you make a lot of important points, but her defenders will point out two things:
    1. Those children have a father who can play the primary caretaker role;
    2. No one would make these sorts of demands of a man.

  19. akech

    Could this also be the ticket to drilling in Alaska by the oil companies? Sara Palin is exited about that!

    Just a mere mention that there will be drilling everywhere in Alaska to ease the energy crisis during her VP acceptance speach could be a game changer.

  20. akech, please understand that there is no energy crisis. There’s absolutely no shortage per demand for oil as a commodity. The price is being driven up by speculation aka market forces run by large investors interested in short term profit. Also by the weak dollar, as a result of Bush/Cheney fiscal policy. The only thing drilling will do is result in even bigger record profits for the oil companies. IT WILL NOT LOWER THE PRICE OF GAS OR OIL.

    The MSM are masters at avoiding simple and obvious truths and amplifying Republican spin. I watched all of 2 minutes of political coverage this afternoon and heard that the Republicans are mad that there is a double standard in the way their perosnal issues are brought before the media while the Democrats get a pass. This is after Bill Clinton and John Edwards. It seems they realize that the attention span of the average voter is about 4 seconds, and they can get away with saying anything.

  21. TripLBee


    I think most of what you say is accurate, but over the past few years the advent of China and India (and to a lesser extent Russia and Brazil) have hugely increased the demand for oil, while oil supplies have not expanded. So there is not a lot of slack in the system which effectively limits the supply of oil as the demand for it increases. I think this—more so than speculation and a weak dollar—is likely to keep energy prices (and food and other commodity prices for that matter) high for the foreseeable future. The bottomline is that we’re probably not going to go back to the days, not so long ago, when gas was under $2 a gallon and our utility bills were reasonable.

  22. One more fallacy about drilling. The oil companies have access to about 90 million acres of public land. About 70 million acres of that land is still unexplored for oil potential. Why don’t the oil companies explore that land before they ask for more? Because this isn’t even about oil production, it’s about grabbing more federal land to eventually drill on. A case in point is the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge. About 95 percent of the north slope of Alaska is open to the oil companies. They want the LAST 5 PERCENT.

    Read this link


    None of these facts will be presented tonight.

  23. Angie

    Trip: I hear you whole heartedly. Interestingly enough, I actually challenged my students in class today with the same argument. While I was having this discussion, I realized how sexist it is of me to think that the mother is the only parenting partner that is capable of providing care and support to the teenage daughter and infant son.
    But what I know is behind all of the politically correct and non-sexist demands, it is often times the mother who bonds and nurtures her children in the time of a crisis. Yes, dad’s play a vital role in the development and nurture of a child. But trust me when I tell you that my mother was able to hold me and comfort me in a way that my father, who is incredibly warm and loving, was not able to.
    Perhaps I’m still being sexist now…

    One more thing I was thinking about today as it pertains to Palin… I can’t believe that this mother would knowingly offer her daughter up the news media. I’m sure that they get CNN, MSNBC, and so on in Alaska. Why is it that this woman did not know that the media would shine the spotlight of scrutiny on her daughter.
    If it were me, I wouldn’t put my daughter through the MSM’s gluttonous appetite for sensational stories.
    That’s why I believe that this woman did not know her child was pregnant. No mother would enter a race and offer her daughter for target practice for the media.

    OT: Did y’all see how Roland Martin went off on the JM campaign last night?

  24. Angie,

    I am a father and I know for sure that when they were infants, our children needed their mother more than they needed me. But there is a difference between reality and politics. If people try to point this out it will be perceived as sexism.

    The other thing that the Obama campaign doesn’t want to enter the conversation is that he has largely been an absent father to his daughters; not emotionally I’m sure, but physically. He has lived in DC for the past four years, coming home on the weekends. And he had a similar schedule when he was a state senator. So he is vulnerable to the same sort of attacks. Come to think of it, so is John McCain. The only one of the bunch who comes home to his kids every night is Joe Biden.

  25. zeitgeist9000

    I don’t have DVR so I had to go back and forth between the McFailin speech and Venus and Serena.

    The Venus and Serena match was great! But Venus going 0 for 10 on set points is kinda the reason why people suspect she lets Serena win. Or maybe Serena really wanted it.

    On the Palin speech: the “hockey moms” racist coda was scary. The culture wars are back in the form of Sarah Palin, and it’s downright frightening…

  26. Zeitgeist, I couldn’t agree with you more…culture wars, insults, diviseness to the nth degree (or should I say the Karl Rove degree!), basically your typical Republican politics at work. I felt Palin’s speech did diddley-squat to define who she is (other than a beyotch loaded for bear…probably had an AK47 at the ready), what her policies are, and just showcased her as some female loaded up on testosterone trying to play with ‘the boys’…very disturbing, very disturbing.

    I just hope that if this is the BS America is going to lap up (kool-aid anyone?), that Barack and Joe stop taking the high road all the time and hit back at the low level Palin set tonight. Sad, sad, sad.

  27. Angie

    I still cannot believe that Palin, a Christian conservative, found it to be in good taste to bring her pregnant teenage daughter out on the stage with the baby daddy. Really? Little Pistol Bristol is such a good role model for our young people? Brittany Spears little sister gets pregnant, and she loses her show on Disney. Pistol Bristol gets pregnant and she’s trotted out on stage like she is the hero of the “typical American family”, receiving a thunderous applause from hard-right-wing conservatives. Huh? I’m so confused.
    Someone wake me up when this dream is over…

  28. Angie

    Here’s what I know… In Christian circles, we are taught to be anything but “typical.” We are taught to be peculiar, to be a light in a dark place, to be the salt of the earth, to be sanctified.
    Why is it okay to be typical now?
    Is it just because one of the “lights” daughter is the one that is pregnant?

    Now, don’t get me wrong. I understand that people are people. I understand that God gives us choices. But these people act like it is a bloody shame if you don’t follow the prescribed laws of the Christian Bible. They act like it is the end of life if you make a mistake.

    So, why are they now being so understanding, so forgiving?

    Pistol Bristol is a teenage mother. She got pregnant at 16-years-old. Most people would agree that this is a tragedy when a child gets pregnant. It is far from typical… Well, unless it’s your family, and you’re doing everything possible to justify the mistake and make it appear to be okay…

    I could not understand for the life of me why Palin would think that it is a good idea to offer her daughter up as a sacrifice. What kind of mother puts their young child in the fire like that

  29. So we can all agree that the Republicans have ratcheted up hypocrisy to dizzying heights. I think our good friend Jon Stewart lays it bare for all to see in the following clip:


    That being said, I think we’re the ones who are applying a double standard to Palin regarding how to manage her daughter’s pregnancy. Can you imagine how viciously we would be savaging her had she arrived at the convention with all of her children, EXCEPT the teenage daughter who is pregnant? We’d be rightfully accusing her of abandoning her daughter during her time of need. Whatever low opinion we have of Palin and her party, do we really think she should be expressing shame and embarrassment about her own child?

  30. Angie

    Trip: What you don’t understand is that I believe that Sarah Palin should not have showed up to the convention at all. She should not have accepted the nomination, knowing that her daughter was pregnant.
    How could Palin ever could’ve thought that the media wouldn’t report on this and shine a blinding light on her daughter? Why would you put your child through that?
    This is utterly ridiculous.

  31. Angie,

    I don’t disagree with you but I’ll play Devil’s advocate for a moment. Obama has decided to essentially be an absentee father because he believes the stakes are so high the sacrifice is worth it. Palin may feel the same way. She has a chance to break a pretty firm glass ceiling and she has a chance to resurrect a religious movement that has been losing steam. The crisis with her daughter will pass, but this moment may never come again for her.

  32. Angie

    Trip: You’re absolutely right; the crisis with her daughter will indeed pass. I can agree with you on that. And honestly, I care very little about her daughter’s pregnancy. I’m mostly annoyed by this because I think that it is ridiculous to put her daughter in the center of a media storm. I consider that a moral and character issue. I question the leadership of a woman that can’t manage her household, and one that cannot exercise the best judgment on how to protect and nurture her children in the time of a challenge. Plus, I am incredibly offended by the double standard that has been applied to this situation.

    But the crisis that her infant son sits squarely in will last for a lifetime. Yes, Obama’s daughters are without him during the week. But they are not physically or mentally disabled. But Trig is. There is a reason why disabled children have been labelled “special needs.” The needs of this child require that the parents are there for him, especially as an infant.
    Like I said in a previous comment, giving birth to a child may indeed be noble. But extending that comprehensive care after birth is what I believe is the most important to a child, especially an infant with a significant disability.
    Perhaps I’m the crazy one.

    And I’m through with this. This woman and her children have gotten too much of my attention. I got my own family problems.
    So, next I will put all of my focus on her ridiculous claims that she is qualified to be VP.
    Where shall I start?
    Well, let’s start with her claim of cutting government spending by cutting out the personal driver and chef. Really? I’m sure that did a great deal of improvement on the state’s budget. Oh yeah, she sold the jet on Ebay. Wow!
    Where shall I go next?
    Um… Let’s see… I don’t know. She really didn’t talk about how she’s qualified, did she? She mostly talked about how Obama wasn’t supposedly qualified.

    Actually, talking about Pistol Bristol and Trig is more interesting to me. **wink**

    Putting the sarcasm aside: I think that it is time to sick Hil on Palin. She think a damn hockey mom is a pit bull with lipstick. Please… She ain’t seen nothing until Clinton eat her up.
    But the question is: Will Senator Clinton do the right thing and speak out against Palin’s claims that she is more qualified and ready to be POTUS over both Obama and Biden.

    I had decided that I shouldn’t watch tonight’s lies, but my mother talked me into sticking it out. I’ll see how much I can stomach before I have to get up and walk away.

  33. Angie

    I started off watching the speech, and then I fell asleep. I think that says a lot.
    After a couple of minutes, my mother woke me up to hear the rest of JM’s script.

    Here’s the line of the speech that I hate the most.
    “I’m not running for president because I think I’m blessed with such personal greatness that history has anointed me to save our country in its hour of need.”

    Excuse me? What the hell does he mean by that?
    “History has anointed me” How should I translate that?

    One thing I thought was hilarious was JM parading his mother’s age out for all the world to somehow think that he can live 96+ years like her.

    Rikyrah, I have a question. Do you know what happened when his speech was broken by someone yelling out something? What happened with that?

  34. Angie

    One more thing…
    I hate it that these women are now calling Sarah Palin a strong woman that is able to still be feminine.
    What? Are you freaking kidding me?
    What exactly makes Palin more feminine than Clinton?
    Could it be that she’s younger, or possibly prettier?
    If I’m not mistaken, I don’t think that youth and beauty translates as feminine.
    And if she is feminine… Who gives a damn? What good will that do us in the White House?

    Another comment on her yuck speech…
    As for her bad mouthing and/or minimizing the contributions of community organizers, I find i to be ridiculous. Doesn’t this pitbull with lipstick on her teeth know that it was community organizers that gathered in Seneca Falls in 1848 to fight for the rights of (white) women in this country.
    Doesn’t she know it was community organizers that helped black men be given the right to vote in this country?
    I’m sure she has to know that it was community organizers that won all women the right to vote.
    I’m sure she knows that it was community organizers that fought for the freedom and civil liberties of African people that are oppressed in this country.
    Doesn’t Sarah Palin, the mother of a special needs child, know that it was community organizers that fought for the ADA and IDEA for children and adults with disabilities?

    This woman has to be out of her mind.

  35. “Do you know what happened when his speech was broken by someone yelling out something? What happened with that?”

    Angie a few protestors were able to slip the gestapo and inject a few words of truth into the proceeding before being subdued. They are probably being waterboarded as we speak.

  36. Angie

    Tonight, my mother and I watched a rally that JM and SP were holding in Sterling Heights, Michigan. Although it was a different city, a different day, different people, the damn speeches were the same that were delivered at the GOP convention.
    Palin gave her speech almost word for word. It was so close in words and inflections that I told my mother that it was absolutely the same event. My mother, being the one could see, corrected me and informed me that it was a different setting, in an entirely different city, on a different day.
    After the pit bull with lipstick on her teeth got through lying and bragging about cutting the budget in Alaska by discontinuing chef and driver services, she introduced the Lying John. Why did this man get up and reperform his speech as well?
    Man, it was crazy. The silly folks in the crowd were cheering like they had never heard the speech, let alone the night before. They were shouting the same damn chants.

    As Palin was speaking, I couldn’t help but to think about her infant son, who she says she has a “special love” for, because he is disabled. I wondered how he was doing. I wondered who was holding him as his mother was standing up in front of a group of Americans who think they are better than the rest of America. I wondered who was comforting him as his mother was romancing a group of Americans who, by their policies, clearly do not have a “special love” for children or adults with disabilities.

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