Kristi Watts: Pat Robertson’s Slave Girl


Questionable Role: Pat Robertson’s un-be-weave-ably happy darkie co-host on the right wing 700 club. KRISTI NEEDS YOUR HELP
Age: Old enough to know damn better. Sex: Female
Date she left reality: The day her stupid arse went to work for Robertson’s talabangelical network in 1999. Race: Black (Kristi’s membership in the race is under review.)
Latest Incident: Sitting there like a lobotomized coon while Pat Robertson attempted to discourage charitable giving to Haiti by spinning a fictitious tale of Haitians making a pact with the devil to gain independence from the French. Height: 5’6″
City Last Seen: Virginia Beach Weight: 140 lbs
State : Virginia Hair: Weave
Country: United States Eye Color: Brown
What You can do: Apparently Kristi doesn’t know that slavery is over and that she is free to leave Pat Robertson’s racist plantation network at any time to find legitimate work that doesn’t prey on her people’s religiosity and steal their hard earned money. Your generous contribution will help assist a team of professionals that will plan and execute an intervention on Kristi. They will show her that she doesn’t have to be Pat’s fuc*ing slave girl and that Christianity is not synonymous with the GOP. Should they fail to persuade Kristi, they’ll just beat her damn arse like she stole somethin.’

29 thoughts on “Kristi Watts: Pat Robertson’s Slave Girl

  1. Fred

    My heart and soul goes out to this Sistah? I pray she wakes up before it is too late. Leave this religious charlaton.

  2. janet

    I laughed out loud when I read this. What do you say about Michael Steele? He’s funny even when he’s trying so hard to be serious. What a joke. I love that he’s the head of the Republican national committee.

  3. Janet,

    Scroll down on the right hand side of the page and click on Michael Steele’s name. I have written quite a lot about Mr. Steele and his moral bankruptcy and deceptive politics.

  4. TripLBee

    Glad to see you back Skep.

    I was hoping that this woman merely had a tan and wasn’t black. What a pity. What a crying shame.

  5. Dannie22

    Oh my God!!!! That was hilarious!!! I think poor Kristi was given mind control drugs. You know they have ways to brainwash folks. Doesn’t the CIA do that? Maybe if we capture her, we can still save her.

  6. nikki

    I’m amazed at how Kristi just nodded her head and did not bother to look at the camera crew to signal that this may not be appropriate at all. Sometimes you need to leave the nutts on the side of the road ALONE but she clearly demonstrated that she saw thing wrong. I’m not Christian but it doesn’t take a genius to know that what she did by not speaking up or walking away was just as bad as Pat. Birds of feather flock together. I’m now curious what did she think in 2004 and 2005 when he made inhuman comments about the Tsunami victims and Hurricane Katrina respectfully.

    This just show that the network has no respect for people of color no matter what background they come from or what country. A pure disgrace.

    I would love to see her in the Black communitiy now.

    Sell out>>>

  7. You got to believe she was feeling just a wee bit uncomfortable while ole Pat was going off into his Alzheimers-induced fog of a rant, but she sure did a good job of not showing it. It must take years of practice to ride oneself of the Pat Robertson gag reflex. Say what you will, she is a consummate professional at what she does.

  8. Judy J

    It sucks to be her. THe best thing that she can do is get Pat a good history book, after she has studied it herself.

  9. Educate not berate

    Look- if you’re on here abusing a fellow sistah- making fun of her weave and calling her names like “un-be-weavably happy darkie”- as far as I’m concerned you’re just as bad as she is. As black people, with everything we’ve gone through, we should have more empathy for one another and understand the ways in which race issues affect us ALL DIFFERENTLY. Some people are in denial more than others. Don’t be angry. Be sympathetic. Educate- NOT BERATE. That won’t get us anywhere as black people- being divided and attacking one another when we should be attacking the racists like Pat Robertson that cause and perpetuate the divisions and LOVE to see us divided and seeing red and not thinking clearly so that we can’t combat racism effectively.

  10. BAM

    Hey Skeptical B,

    Who would’ve guessed that 12+ years surfing the ‘net would turn up my twin brother! My roots are too in the ‘Linas N & S. DNA may verify this. Our minds are eerily tuned to the same frequency. Keep up the excellent wordsmithing.
    “National Center for Delusional and Exploited Negroes”. I love it.
    I’m sharing your blog.

  11. Carlie

    Funny, sharp satire! Thank you.

    Dear “Educate not berate”:

    Holding this backbiting harridan up to ridicule is hardly the moral equivalent of her perpetually allowing herself to be used as a shield enabling white supremacist mythology.

    Folks should treat one another with more love and empathy. That does that mean that we should fail to challenge those who endorse dehumanization. (And yes, her mere presence is an endorsement of his words.)

    Laughing at her is a fairly gentle, loving response to her continued betrayal. Is satire angry? Doubtful. But it is, by definition, enlightening.

    As for denial, I fully expected that she would freely lend aid and comfort to this hater and then be defended within the black community. This has been a pleasant surprise.

    There’s a profound difference between criticism and division. Exposing and denouncing her folly is educational. As there is no doubt that her job is an act against our interest. Besides, it’s a poor reading of history to think we need to be undivided in order to act in common-cause.

  12. caravelli

    i think Pat is banging her too..she did the same stupid shyt when he hated on Kwanzaa several years ago. wow.

  13. This is really sad. I feel sorry for her. How can she live with herself?!!! The mental damage Black people still suffer even today is unbelievable. This broadcast is a trick of the devil and in no way represents Christ.

  14. Pat Robertson Supporter

    I find the comments posted here so funny that I tears are running down my cheeks and my face hurts through laughing so much. Some people here really have enormous chips on their shoulders. Get over yourselves!

  15. BKE

    I’d actually like to ask her out. I like her personality…a lot. I like that she takes a stance that is not popular in this society and dares to co-host a show that is considered anathema here in the Northeast, and apparently with you, Janet. She looks like a woman of strong character who is capable of withstanding ummerited, uninvited and unwarranted verbal, and written, darts from anonymous individuals who base their opinions on the false data presented above. I like that she is a single mother who is trying to raise her son and is not afraid to let that be known on an “Evangelical Christian” show. Sounds like good wife material to me.

    Also, “Evangelical Christian” you would think that a show like that would be much more judgemental of her status. Hmmm, makes me want to reassess who is really hypocritically judgemental on this site.

    I suppose one can sound bite anything and make it say what you want like the data you presented above. I was especially disturbed by the following,

    “Pat Robertson attempted to discourage charitable giving to Haiti”

    That is really your opinion, Janet. You obviously ignore the fact that their organization was there before, during and after the earthquake with mobil clean water filtering units that allowed locals access to water when no one else was even on the ground yet. You also ignored the week long telethon they had immediately following the earthquake that raised money for Haiti that grew into the millions of dollars.

    Anybody who knows anything about Haitian history knows the following statement is untrue…the story is not fictitious

    “by spinning a fictitious tale of Haitians making a pact with the devil to gain independence from the French.”

    The Haitians don’t even dispute that. According to the book, “Written in Blood” by Heinl Nancy Gordon the sacrifice of a pig to Satan happened in 1792 dedicating the island in exchange for their future freedom which happened Jan 1, 1804. There is a statue of a black pig looking over the port of Port Au Prince celebrating that fact. I saw it when I was there in 1990.

    If you are going to porpagate hate speech such as what you claim above, OK, but at least base your hate speech on facts and not your particular discriminatory bent.

  16. BKE


    Thank you for your reply. It’s easy to be judgemental and smug when you are anonymous. I also thank you for the lesson, “Don’t waste time with these sites.”

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